1 00:00:30,239 --> 00:00:31,114 FAMILY FATHER 2 00:00:32,658 --> 00:00:33,742 SPA FROM QUAHOG 3 00:00:36,036 --> 00:00:39,289 You are going to love this spa. They give great massages. 4 00:00:39,373 --> 00:00:41,792 You will feel the body Like Joe's legs. 5 00:00:41,875 --> 00:00:44,378 That would be nice for a short period. 6 00:00:44,461 --> 00:00:47,589 I need it. I have had a very stressful morning. 7 00:00:47,673 --> 00:00:51,927 One moment. Are you telling me it's 8:25? 8 00:00:52,010 --> 00:00:53,762 - Fairly. - Damn. 9 00:00:53,846 --> 00:00:55,722 I'm late to class. 10 00:01:15,534 --> 00:01:18,579 Make yourself comfortable at the table. 11 00:01:18,662 --> 00:01:21,290 - I'll give you a minute. - What do I have to...? 12 00:01:28,714 --> 00:01:31,008 - Are you ready? - Yes. 13 00:01:32,718 --> 00:01:35,012 has put a poop lying on the ground. 14 00:01:35,095 --> 00:01:36,305 No. 15 00:01:36,388 --> 00:01:38,765 Out. Out. Long. 16 00:01:40,350 --> 00:01:41,685 This is better. 17 00:01:49,401 --> 00:01:50,611 Is the music good? 18 00:01:50,694 --> 00:01:54,364 Would you mind tuning into 97.1? 19 00:01:54,448 --> 00:01:56,700 They are listening The silent storm. 20 00:01:56,783 --> 00:01:59,286 Next, the music of The Isleys... 21 00:01:59,369 --> 00:02:03,540 ...Teddy Pendergrass, and now, Let's listen to Marvin Gaye. 22 00:02:03,624 --> 00:02:05,876 Now yes. 23 00:02:07,044 --> 00:02:09,755 I was missing it a lot. 24 00:02:10,130 --> 00:02:12,966 There is nothing like a good suit massage. 25 00:02:13,050 --> 00:02:17,012 Insist on the lapels, where stress accumulates. 26 00:02:17,971 --> 00:02:21,225 Ok, let's see this: if you were gay and you had to go to bed... 27 00:02:21,308 --> 00:02:24,603 ...with John Forsythe or Sean Connery, who would you choose? 28 00:02:24,686 --> 00:02:26,605 That's easy. John Forsythe. 29 00:02:26,688 --> 00:02:29,024 - Yes, John Forsythe. - John Forsythe, without a doubt. 30 00:02:29,107 --> 00:02:31,985 I would also say John Forsythe. It was just curiosity. 31 00:02:32,069 --> 00:02:34,821 Yes, Sean Connery is so... 32 00:02:36,156 --> 00:02:38,617 God, how sorry I am. 33 00:02:38,700 --> 00:02:41,662 Too late. The damage is done. 34 00:02:41,745 --> 00:02:45,040 MINI SUPERMARKET FROM QUAHOG 35 00:02:45,123 --> 00:02:48,794 Do you know what I bought? The Lord of the Rings collection. 36 00:02:48,877 --> 00:02:50,379 - It's great. - Yes. 37 00:02:50,462 --> 00:02:53,048 Do you remember the giant eagle from the first... 38 00:02:53,131 --> 00:02:55,300 ...what rescues them in the third? 39 00:02:55,384 --> 00:02:56,426 - Yes, yes. - Yeah. 40 00:02:56,510 --> 00:02:58,804 Why didn't they send her to Mordor... 41 00:02:58,887 --> 00:03:01,640 ...instead of passing three movies going? 42 00:03:01,723 --> 00:03:04,393 That's not funny. Grace is adventure. 43 00:03:04,476 --> 00:03:08,230 I'm not arguing, I'm just saying it's a mistake. 44 00:03:09,606 --> 00:03:11,859 -Have you ever seen Krull? - No. 45 00:03:11,942 --> 00:03:13,819 Yes, you don't need to see Krull. 46 00:03:13,902 --> 00:03:16,738 The best thing you can give to the body after a massage... 47 00:03:16,822 --> 00:03:19,366 ...it's hot coffee, alcohol and Slim Jims. 48 00:03:19,449 --> 00:03:21,535 Dad, I'm glad you came. 49 00:03:21,618 --> 00:03:23,370 I wanted to ask you something. 50 00:03:23,453 --> 00:03:25,122 - What, Chris? - Well... 51 00:03:25,497 --> 00:03:28,917 ...today, in gym class, one of my testicles... 52 00:03:29,001 --> 00:03:32,629 ...it got into me and it hasn't come out yet. 53 00:03:32,713 --> 00:03:34,298 I'm a little scared. 54 00:03:34,381 --> 00:03:37,301 Sir, this employee He made a sexual advance to me. 55 00:03:37,384 --> 00:03:39,428 No, dad. I'm worried, really. 56 00:03:39,803 --> 00:03:41,972 Look, is it normal? 57 00:03:42,055 --> 00:03:45,309 Sir, your employee is exposing himself. 58 00:03:45,392 --> 00:03:47,603 - Dad. - I could sue him. 59 00:03:47,686 --> 00:03:49,104 Well, let's see, let's see. 60 00:03:49,521 --> 00:03:53,650 If you forget what has happened, I will give you this gas card. 61 00:03:53,734 --> 00:03:57,905 Free gas for a year for threatening to sue him? 62 00:03:57,988 --> 00:04:01,408 And because he's not the ugliest guy that has entered here. 63 00:04:01,491 --> 00:04:03,410 That's what I wanted to hear. 64 00:04:08,248 --> 00:04:12,085 Wow, a free gas card. We can save a lot of money. 65 00:04:12,169 --> 00:04:14,755 Yes, everyone except Brian, who bought a Prius. 66 00:04:14,838 --> 00:04:15,881 What a loser. 67 00:04:18,050 --> 00:04:19,968 What have I missed? Are you laughing at Brian? 68 00:04:20,052 --> 00:04:21,553 Brian, you're disgusting. 69 00:04:22,429 --> 00:04:24,056 What the hell is this? 70 00:04:24,139 --> 00:04:27,434 I threw away all your apple juice. Now we consume gasoline. 71 00:04:27,518 --> 00:04:29,770 Have you put gasoline in his bottle? 72 00:04:29,853 --> 00:04:32,856 Idiot! You're more useless than Aquaman. 73 00:04:34,942 --> 00:04:37,402 Relief! that someone help me! Rape! 74 00:04:37,486 --> 00:04:40,030 Shout all you want, no one will hear you. 75 00:04:40,113 --> 00:04:41,156 I do. 76 00:04:41,240 --> 00:04:42,658 Aquaman, help! 77 00:04:42,741 --> 00:04:45,035 Hey, hey, let her go. 78 00:04:45,369 --> 00:04:46,411 Or what? 79 00:04:46,495 --> 00:04:48,038 Or... Or... 80 00:04:48,121 --> 00:04:49,665 I don't know, man, but... 81 00:04:49,748 --> 00:04:52,668 ...you're lucky not doing it in the sea... 82 00:04:53,001 --> 00:04:55,337 ...because then I would stop you. 83 00:04:55,420 --> 00:04:57,089 For the love of God, help! 84 00:04:57,172 --> 00:04:58,674 Do something! 85 00:04:59,675 --> 00:05:03,178 If you don't like the stars of sea, you're going to be angry. 86 00:05:03,262 --> 00:05:05,138 God! Relief! 87 00:05:05,222 --> 00:05:08,767 You blew it, buddy. Five fish come to help me. 88 00:05:09,351 --> 00:05:10,978 Here they are. 89 00:05:11,061 --> 00:05:12,980 Relief! It's hurting me! 90 00:05:13,063 --> 00:05:14,815 You shouldn't have provoked it. 91 00:05:15,148 --> 00:05:18,151 SPOONER STREET 92 00:05:19,528 --> 00:05:21,321 Peter, what the hell is that? 93 00:05:21,405 --> 00:05:23,115 A space shuttle, Lois. 94 00:05:23,198 --> 00:05:26,702 With free gas, finally I will be able to afford to go to space. 95 00:05:26,785 --> 00:05:28,829 Why is it that every time I open the door... 96 00:05:28,912 --> 00:05:32,249 ...you are in a vehicle that have you acquired inexplicably? 97 00:05:32,332 --> 00:05:34,626 I have bought it at auction for almost nothing. 98 00:05:34,710 --> 00:05:37,462 They were going to remove it due to a mechanical problem... 99 00:05:37,546 --> 00:05:39,715 ...and they sold it to me, very simple. 100 00:05:39,798 --> 00:05:43,552 I don't want you to try to pilot it. You're not even an astronaut. 101 00:05:43,635 --> 00:05:46,638 Peaceful. To the space shuttles Nothing ever happens to them. 102 00:05:46,722 --> 00:05:48,015 Back. 103 00:05:58,400 --> 00:05:59,943 3 DAYS LATER 104 00:06:00,736 --> 00:06:02,613 I'm back from space, guys. 105 00:06:02,696 --> 00:06:04,072 You've been lucky. 106 00:06:04,156 --> 00:06:06,742 - How was it, dad? - Amazing. 107 00:06:06,825 --> 00:06:09,328 Go around the Earth at eight kilometers per second. 108 00:06:09,411 --> 00:06:12,831 Watch the sun rise over The Sea of Japan is indescribable. 109 00:06:13,290 --> 00:06:16,335 I've had time to masturbate. In space it's great... 110 00:06:16,418 --> 00:06:18,837 ...although you end up living in a snowball. 111 00:06:18,921 --> 00:06:22,424 Instead of wasting gasoline in comic acrobatics... 112 00:06:22,508 --> 00:06:24,760 ...why don't you use it productively? 113 00:06:24,843 --> 00:06:26,845 We could go on vacation. 114 00:06:26,929 --> 00:06:28,430 Great idea, mom. 115 00:06:28,514 --> 00:06:30,557 We could go to the Isle of Lost. 116 00:06:30,641 --> 00:06:33,560 No, I don't want to hear Matthew Fox's heavy breathing. 117 00:06:35,103 --> 00:06:37,564 Kate, you don't understand. 118 00:06:38,148 --> 00:06:40,192 We are the island. 119 00:06:43,028 --> 00:06:44,613 Give me that paper bag. 120 00:06:46,782 --> 00:06:48,951 Jack, it has my poop inside. 121 00:06:49,284 --> 00:06:50,369 I already know. 122 00:06:50,452 --> 00:06:51,578 I already know. 123 00:06:51,954 --> 00:06:53,664 It has a touch of coconut. 124 00:06:53,747 --> 00:06:55,332 And something else. 125 00:06:55,666 --> 00:06:57,334 But that's part of the mystery. 126 00:06:58,919 --> 00:07:01,088 All aboard for the Grand Canyon. 127 00:07:06,051 --> 00:07:07,719 I know you're sleepy, Stewie... 128 00:07:07,803 --> 00:07:09,763 ...but you can sleep in the car. 129 00:07:10,806 --> 00:07:12,140 Six in the morning. 130 00:07:12,224 --> 00:07:15,477 I shouldn't have spent the night listening to Persian radio. 131 00:07:15,561 --> 00:07:18,480 We have heard Roxette with "You've Got the Look." 132 00:07:18,564 --> 00:07:22,693 It's 9:00 p.m. and we continue at 27 degrees on the street. 133 00:07:22,776 --> 00:07:24,194 How hot. 134 00:07:24,278 --> 00:07:26,864 If you are driving on the left... 135 00:07:26,947 --> 00:07:30,200 ...at 120 kilometers per hour through the Sahahabi desert... 136 00:07:30,284 --> 00:07:31,535 ...turn up the decibels... 137 00:07:31,618 --> 00:07:37,875 ...to listen to Shaleb Mami with Zahec Malec 103.2, the Hoch. 138 00:07:39,418 --> 00:07:40,919 And those birds? 139 00:07:41,003 --> 00:07:42,337 My collection of tropical birds. 140 00:07:42,421 --> 00:07:44,256 - Just in case. - Just in case what? 141 00:07:44,339 --> 00:07:46,675 You won't need twelve tropical birds. 142 00:07:46,758 --> 00:07:49,303 I didn't know you could read the future. 143 00:07:49,636 --> 00:07:51,805 Tell me tomorrow's lottery number. 144 00:07:51,889 --> 00:07:52,931 What an idiotic woman. 145 00:07:53,348 --> 00:07:55,642 Peter, don't put the birds in the car. 146 00:07:55,726 --> 00:07:58,395 So, we're not going on vacation. 147 00:07:59,188 --> 00:08:01,190 Good. Then, I go back to bed. 148 00:08:02,316 --> 00:08:05,235 Okay, Peter, you can take the birds 149 00:08:05,319 --> 00:08:08,238 You're going to let me be myself. Well, let's go. 150 00:08:10,407 --> 00:08:12,201 Well, guys, here we go. 151 00:08:12,284 --> 00:08:13,952 We're going to have a blast. 152 00:08:14,661 --> 00:08:16,288 - Say. - Hello, Peter. How are you? 153 00:08:16,371 --> 00:08:18,790 Hello, Quagmire. I'm going on vacation. 154 00:08:18,874 --> 00:08:22,503 Excellent. Wait, I have in front of me to a fat man who goes at a snail's pace. 155 00:08:22,586 --> 00:08:24,213 Come on, idiot. Move away. 156 00:08:24,630 --> 00:08:27,883 Wait, Quagmire. Some asshole is beeping at me. 157 00:08:27,966 --> 00:08:29,259 Send him to hell. 158 00:08:29,343 --> 00:08:31,303 Wait, a fat man He told me to go to hell. 159 00:08:31,386 --> 00:08:33,055 Fuck you, bastard. 160 00:08:33,138 --> 00:08:36,934 - Wait, he's going to find out. - Yes, this one too. 161 00:08:37,017 --> 00:08:38,894 - I'll call you after the fight. - Me too. 162 00:08:38,977 --> 00:08:40,854 - Good luck. - Good luck. 163 00:08:52,199 --> 00:08:54,576 Lois. I woke up, Lois. 164 00:08:55,035 --> 00:08:56,119 Lois! 165 00:08:56,787 --> 00:08:58,121 Lois? 166 00:08:58,205 --> 00:08:59,790 Where the hell is everyone? 167 00:08:59,873 --> 00:09:03,252 This is more deserted than James Gandolfini's gym. 168 00:09:12,427 --> 00:09:14,429 To wait for breakfast. 169 00:09:15,514 --> 00:09:16,390 Lois! 170 00:09:17,140 --> 00:09:19,017 I know how to get your attention. 171 00:09:20,269 --> 00:09:23,313 Lois, I'm going to drink my first soda. 172 00:09:23,397 --> 00:09:25,065 You better stop me. 173 00:09:26,191 --> 00:09:27,568 That must be the sugar. 174 00:09:28,026 --> 00:09:29,653 God, how good. 175 00:09:30,904 --> 00:09:33,365 Rupert suddenly I want to run. Catch me. 176 00:09:42,791 --> 00:09:43,750 Now I'm sad. 177 00:09:47,254 --> 00:09:49,214 Brian, take a look at Stewie... 178 00:09:49,298 --> 00:09:50,716 - ...do you want? - Alright. 179 00:09:50,799 --> 00:09:53,093 How about we sing a song? 180 00:11:31,233 --> 00:11:32,734 Very good. Very good. 181 00:11:32,818 --> 00:11:35,696 Chris, you're ahead of yourself. a little in the fourth measure. 182 00:11:35,779 --> 00:11:39,116 - What did you think? - Brilliant. Do you want to repeat it? 183 00:11:39,199 --> 00:11:41,660 - If it seemed good to you, no. - For me, great. 184 00:11:41,743 --> 00:11:42,786 Okay. We already have a shot. 185 00:11:45,914 --> 00:11:47,332 There is no trace of them. 186 00:11:47,708 --> 00:11:48,667 Meg. 187 00:11:48,750 --> 00:11:50,919 Chris. Brian. 188 00:11:51,503 --> 00:11:52,546 They are gone. 189 00:11:52,629 --> 00:11:54,089 I'm alone. 190 00:11:54,464 --> 00:11:55,966 I can do whatever I want. 191 00:11:57,176 --> 00:11:58,677 In Brian's novel... 192 00:11:58,760 --> 00:12:01,805 ...I'm going to replace all the "and" for "fart". 193 00:12:03,223 --> 00:12:06,226 "The young soldier fart his brother looked at each other. 194 00:12:06,310 --> 00:12:09,813 Fart they both knew that with love fart truth fart bravery... 195 00:12:09,897 --> 00:12:12,691 ...the two would re-fart from their ashes." 196 00:12:13,192 --> 00:12:14,902 This one hasn't turned out well. 197 00:12:16,320 --> 00:12:20,407 Let's see what fascinating treasures pubescent has Chris hidden. 198 00:12:21,158 --> 00:12:22,868 Hustler Magazine. 199 00:12:22,951 --> 00:12:25,412 I'll finally see what a vagina is like. 200 00:12:25,495 --> 00:12:28,373 God. My God. My God. 201 00:12:32,211 --> 00:12:34,087 You won't be able to hurt him anymore... 202 00:12:34,171 --> 00:12:37,424 ...to no one ever again. 203 00:12:39,510 --> 00:12:40,636 ZERO ZONE 204 00:12:42,596 --> 00:12:45,807 What do we do in New York? I thought we were going to the Grand Canyon? 205 00:12:45,891 --> 00:12:48,977 I wanted to present our respects. 206 00:12:50,938 --> 00:12:52,397 Ground Zero. 207 00:12:52,814 --> 00:12:55,234 Here it was infected AIDS for the first time. 208 00:12:55,317 --> 00:12:58,278 Peter, is where they occurred the 9/11 attacks. 209 00:12:58,362 --> 00:13:00,489 - Did Saddam Hussein do this? - No. 210 00:13:00,572 --> 00:13:01,698 -The Iraqi army? - No. 211 00:13:01,782 --> 00:13:03,075 - Some Iraqis? - No. 212 00:13:03,158 --> 00:13:05,369 That woman who visited Iraq? 213 00:13:05,452 --> 00:13:07,162 Iraq had nothing to do with it. 214 00:13:07,246 --> 00:13:09,623 It was a handful of Arabs, Lebanese and Egyptians... 215 00:13:09,706 --> 00:13:12,209 ...financed by an Arab in Afghanistan... 216 00:13:12,292 --> 00:13:14,002 ...hosted by Pakistanis. 217 00:13:14,378 --> 00:13:17,047 So do we have to invade Iran? 218 00:13:19,466 --> 00:13:21,134 Wake up, Stewie. 219 00:13:21,218 --> 00:13:24,304 I'm going to get you up from there and change your diaper. 220 00:13:24,721 --> 00:13:25,681 My God. 221 00:13:25,764 --> 00:13:27,850 Peter, Stewie's not in the car. 222 00:13:27,933 --> 00:13:29,935 My God, he must have stayed home. 223 00:13:30,018 --> 00:13:34,231 God, I'm laughing my ass off. 224 00:13:34,314 --> 00:13:35,983 He will be climbing the walls. 225 00:13:36,066 --> 00:13:38,777 I would give anything to see his face right now. 226 00:13:38,861 --> 00:13:40,028 It must be saying: 227 00:13:40,112 --> 00:13:42,197 "Where the hell is everyone?" 228 00:13:42,281 --> 00:13:44,241 I don't imitate Stewie very well. 229 00:13:44,324 --> 00:13:46,535 My God, what a bad mother I am. 230 00:13:46,869 --> 00:13:48,620 We have to go home. 231 00:13:48,704 --> 00:13:52,165 Great, Lois. we will get lost the holidays. What a bummer. 232 00:13:52,249 --> 00:13:54,376 Whenever you come to this place... 233 00:13:54,459 --> 00:13:57,337 ...I will associate it with a bad memory. 234 00:13:57,421 --> 00:14:00,883 We could call Quagmire and Cleveland to see how he is doing. 235 00:14:00,966 --> 00:14:03,385 They could take care of him until we get back. 236 00:14:03,468 --> 00:14:06,096 Okay, okay. 237 00:14:06,180 --> 00:14:08,265 They have a good hand with children. 238 00:14:08,348 --> 00:14:10,517 Like Robin Williams in Patch Adams. 239 00:14:10,601 --> 00:14:14,271 You're all lying there. Liar, liar. 240 00:14:14,354 --> 00:14:17,357 Where am I, in Congress? Laughter is the best medicine. 241 00:14:17,441 --> 00:14:20,360 Please, sir. I have a lot of pain. 242 00:14:20,444 --> 00:14:22,946 Shut up and listen to my jokes. What is this? 243 00:14:23,030 --> 00:14:25,115 A wedge. Peter Pan. Next stop: Neverland. 244 00:14:25,199 --> 00:14:27,534 Come, Wendy, fly with me. 245 00:14:33,081 --> 00:14:35,209 I have never performed a diaper change. 246 00:14:35,292 --> 00:14:38,170 It can't be that difficult. We have to let go of this... 247 00:14:38,253 --> 00:14:41,340 ...lie down with legs raised and let nature do the rest. 248 00:14:44,343 --> 00:14:45,427 Still there. 249 00:14:45,511 --> 00:14:48,222 Typically, poop It disappears, but not this time. 250 00:14:49,264 --> 00:14:50,474 Intruders. 251 00:14:50,557 --> 00:14:52,309 Stewie, are you there? 252 00:14:56,355 --> 00:14:57,523 Do you think it will be here? 253 00:15:00,734 --> 00:15:02,861 God, it's Cleveland and Bob Hope. 254 00:15:02,945 --> 00:15:05,489 The damage is done. Better get them out of here. 255 00:15:05,572 --> 00:15:07,324 I'll tie them up in the basement... 256 00:15:07,407 --> 00:15:10,702 ...with the help channel from DirecTV 24 hours. 257 00:15:12,120 --> 00:15:13,997 What the devil? Where are we? 258 00:15:14,414 --> 00:15:17,000 Knowing your command is easier than you think. 259 00:15:17,084 --> 00:15:20,003 These buttons control the volume, the channel... 260 00:15:20,087 --> 00:15:21,839 ...and the power supply of your device. 261 00:15:21,922 --> 00:15:24,007 To see what else they have, press Guide... 262 00:15:24,091 --> 00:15:27,302 ...and scroll through the menu by pressing the arrow. 263 00:15:27,386 --> 00:15:30,055 - Now that we have learned... - It's not very appropriate... 264 00:15:30,138 --> 00:15:32,182 ...but am I the only one What is being spliced? 265 00:15:32,558 --> 00:15:35,602 Is there anything I don't do Get a hard on, Glenn? 266 00:15:35,686 --> 00:15:38,063 When they say "waste" instead of "garbage." 267 00:15:38,146 --> 00:15:40,315 - Oh really? - I don't even move a hair. 268 00:15:40,399 --> 00:15:42,401 Your programs will appear in my list. 269 00:15:43,277 --> 00:15:44,611 Peter, it's been eight hours... 270 00:15:44,695 --> 00:15:47,322 ...and I don't know anything about Cleveland or Quagmire. 271 00:15:47,406 --> 00:15:48,949 I even called Joe. 272 00:15:49,032 --> 00:15:50,325 This chair is mine. 273 00:15:50,409 --> 00:15:52,744 There are many alike, but this one is mine. 274 00:15:52,828 --> 00:15:54,913 Without me, it's useless. 275 00:15:54,997 --> 00:15:57,708 Without it, I am useless. 276 00:15:57,791 --> 00:15:59,334 - Be quiet. - Okay. 277 00:15:59,710 --> 00:16:02,129 RHODE ISLAND 240 KILOMETERS 278 00:16:02,588 --> 00:16:05,465 What a bummer. I want to see the Grand Canyon. 279 00:16:05,549 --> 00:16:08,218 I'm sorry but we're not going to leave Stewie alone. 280 00:16:08,302 --> 00:16:09,428 We're going home. 281 00:16:12,598 --> 00:16:15,893 What's cool, those guys have a TV in the car. 282 00:16:15,976 --> 00:16:18,020 You're watching Operation: Dumbo... 283 00:16:18,103 --> 00:16:19,271 ...with Don Knotts. 284 00:16:19,605 --> 00:16:21,690 He has to impregnate this elephant... 285 00:16:21,773 --> 00:16:24,151 ...or the species will become extinct. 286 00:16:24,234 --> 00:16:27,321 Do you want me to put this inside that? 287 00:16:27,404 --> 00:16:30,532 This job is not well paid. 288 00:16:30,616 --> 00:16:32,034 Peter, look at the road. 289 00:16:32,117 --> 00:16:34,661 Lois, leave me alone. I'm watching TV. 290 00:16:34,745 --> 00:16:37,789 Sometimes it seems like you have head upside down. 291 00:16:37,873 --> 00:16:39,958 Do you have any idea...? 292 00:16:49,218 --> 00:16:52,179 Hello, bruised. What are you doing down there? 293 00:16:57,601 --> 00:17:01,146 Rupert, the food is gone, diapers and almost everything else. 294 00:17:01,230 --> 00:17:02,856 I have to look for work. 295 00:17:03,190 --> 00:17:06,568 If not, we will be worse than Albert, the morbidly obese. 296 00:17:06,652 --> 00:17:09,404 Albert, the morbidly obese, We have brought you chocolates. 297 00:17:09,863 --> 00:17:13,575 I can't eat chocolates, for diabetes. 298 00:17:13,992 --> 00:17:15,786 Don't you see that they had What to take off my foot? 299 00:17:16,370 --> 00:17:17,579 Look at the bright side. 300 00:17:17,663 --> 00:17:20,332 Now the shoes come off for half the price. 301 00:17:21,166 --> 00:17:23,794 Okay, I'll eat one. 302 00:17:27,923 --> 00:17:30,259 Welcome to McBurgertown. What did he want? 303 00:17:30,676 --> 00:17:32,094 You have to clean the service. 304 00:17:32,177 --> 00:17:33,929 No no. I don't plan to go back there. 305 00:17:34,346 --> 00:17:37,015 You have no alternative. You have to clean it. 306 00:17:37,099 --> 00:17:39,935 No. No. I was literally alone on the ground. 307 00:17:40,018 --> 00:17:42,104 He didn't try to go near the toilet. 308 00:17:42,521 --> 00:17:45,399 It was as if he had crushed buttocks against the wall. 309 00:17:45,732 --> 00:17:48,110 The only piece of ground that I didn't have poop... 310 00:17:48,193 --> 00:17:49,862 - ...was the one who had a baby. - Come on! 311 00:17:53,615 --> 00:17:56,702 - Have you bought the train tickets? - Well no. 312 00:17:56,785 --> 00:18:00,080 There was a guy selling shower curtain rings. 313 00:18:00,163 --> 00:18:02,165 It was the only money we had left. 314 00:18:02,249 --> 00:18:04,585 They have helium inside, they are very light. 315 00:18:04,668 --> 00:18:05,836 You are amazing. 316 00:18:06,295 --> 00:18:08,338 These four days have been hell. 317 00:18:08,422 --> 00:18:10,132 Our baby is home alone. 318 00:18:10,215 --> 00:18:14,303 Instead of taking us home, You have made things worse. 319 00:18:14,386 --> 00:18:16,847 A monkey would be more evolved than you. 320 00:18:16,930 --> 00:18:18,515 A monkey would talk less. 321 00:18:19,808 --> 00:18:23,478 A piece of advice: if your instinct tells you you do something, don't do it! 322 00:18:23,562 --> 00:18:25,772 If your instinct tells you Don't do something... 323 00:18:25,856 --> 00:18:27,608 ...probably, it is the most appropriate. 324 00:18:29,193 --> 00:18:30,319 Do you want to hurt me? 325 00:18:31,069 --> 00:18:33,113 Go ahead, if it will make you feel better. 326 00:18:33,197 --> 00:18:34,656 I'm an easy target. 327 00:18:34,740 --> 00:18:36,325 Yes you're right. 328 00:18:36,408 --> 00:18:38,327 I talk too much. 329 00:18:38,410 --> 00:18:40,871 I also listen too much. 330 00:18:40,954 --> 00:18:43,707 I could be a cold cynic like you... 331 00:18:43,790 --> 00:18:46,460 ...but I don't like it hurt feelings. 332 00:18:46,543 --> 00:18:49,546 Think what you want about me. I don't plan to change. 333 00:18:49,630 --> 00:18:51,173 I like who I am. 334 00:18:51,840 --> 00:18:53,634 My children like me. 335 00:18:53,717 --> 00:18:55,886 My friends liked me. 336 00:18:55,969 --> 00:18:57,304 Because I am authentic. 337 00:18:57,846 --> 00:18:59,181 No folds. 338 00:19:05,395 --> 00:19:07,064 Cinematic references. 339 00:19:07,147 --> 00:19:10,234 We can go to Quahog in the trailer of a truck. Fast! 340 00:19:10,567 --> 00:19:11,485 Thank God. 341 00:19:11,568 --> 00:19:13,278 Let's go before Stewie gets hurt. 342 00:19:13,362 --> 00:19:15,531 Like Fozzie Bear in Saudi Arabia. 343 00:19:15,906 --> 00:19:17,616 It is good to worship Allah... 344 00:19:17,699 --> 00:19:19,868 ...because before I adored "Musló". 345 00:19:22,788 --> 00:19:25,499 Once, I met a guy that was so Arab... 346 00:19:25,582 --> 00:19:27,042 How Arabic? 347 00:19:27,793 --> 00:19:30,462 He was so Arab that he liked him to everyone... 348 00:19:30,546 --> 00:19:32,464 ...and there was nothing funny about it. 349 00:19:37,803 --> 00:19:39,930 Can you come to my office for a moment? 350 00:19:40,013 --> 00:19:43,183 - Yes. What's wrong? Is everything going well? - Yes, come to my office. 351 00:19:45,310 --> 00:19:48,146 Stewie, Shawanda says who has seen you steal food. 352 00:19:48,230 --> 00:19:49,565 That? 353 00:19:49,648 --> 00:19:52,568 He says he saw you in the kitchen. stealing a fish sandwich. 354 00:19:53,110 --> 00:19:54,778 Come on, man. 355 00:19:55,571 --> 00:19:56,822 Yes, okay. 356 00:19:56,905 --> 00:19:59,199 It was five minutes later when it's time to throw them in the trash. 357 00:19:59,283 --> 00:20:02,286 The fact is that Shawanda He took these photos with his cell phone. 358 00:20:08,333 --> 00:20:09,293 You're fired. 359 00:20:12,963 --> 00:20:14,381 We are broke. 360 00:20:14,464 --> 00:20:16,633 I don't have a job. There is no food left. 361 00:20:16,717 --> 00:20:19,511 I don't have any diapers left and this is Meg's last hat. 362 00:20:19,928 --> 00:20:21,180 We are lost. 363 00:20:21,722 --> 00:20:25,225 Put it on my tombstone that my life was much better... 364 00:20:25,309 --> 00:20:26,602 ...with my family. 365 00:20:26,935 --> 00:20:29,438 I realized it too late. 366 00:20:39,031 --> 00:20:40,574 Mother. Dad. 367 00:20:40,657 --> 00:20:42,826 Chris. Dog. Brian. 368 00:20:42,910 --> 00:20:43,869 They are back. 369 00:20:47,873 --> 00:20:50,667 Mom, thank goodness you're back. 370 00:20:50,751 --> 00:20:52,503 Stewie, my baby. 371 00:20:52,586 --> 00:20:55,464 I promise you with all my heart that I will not say or do... 372 00:20:55,547 --> 00:20:58,175 ...nothing bad during the rest of the night. 373 00:20:58,592 --> 00:21:02,888 By the way, I have disabled the chip and I've seen a lot of porn. 374 00:21:02,971 --> 00:21:05,807 Honey, I'm glad you're okay. 375 00:21:05,891 --> 00:21:08,018 It won't be thanks to Cleveland and Quagmire. 376 00:21:08,101 --> 00:21:09,645 What could have happened to them? 377 00:21:09,728 --> 00:21:11,688 And now you are ready to enjoy... 378 00:21:11,772 --> 00:21:14,233 ...of the options of DirecTV programming. 379 00:21:14,316 --> 00:21:16,693 To answer any questions... 380 00:21:16,777 --> 00:21:18,904 ...you can consult the on-screen menu... 381 00:21:19,238 --> 00:21:24,117 ...or visit, at any time of the day, 382 00:21:24,201 --> 00:21:26,537 www.DirecTV.com/ayuda. 383 00:21:26,620 --> 00:21:29,164 Relax and enjoy DirecTV. 384 00:21:29,248 --> 00:21:30,415 Thanks for tuning in. 385 00:21:31,333 --> 00:21:33,710 Welcome to the channel DirecTV help desk. 386 00:21:33,794 --> 00:21:37,548 To get familiar with its new DirecTV system. 387 00:21:37,631 --> 00:21:39,591 Do you know I'm going to star my own series? 388 00:21:43,470 --> 00:21:45,472 Translation: María Josefa Chacón Tornero